I know a lot of people don’t like personality profiles and similar tests than analyze the psyche, but I love them. I don’t know exactly why, but I think it’s fascinating that a few questions can shed such detailed insight onto my thoughts, habits and character. I read through my results each time and think, “Yes! That’s me!” Over the last couple of months, I’ve been re-reading The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. It’s been years since I’ve read it and taken the quiz, and when my friend, Fabi, suggested reading it together, I was interested to see how/if I’ve changed since the last time. I always find it intriguing that results on any profile tend to reflect our circumstances and periodically change over the years. It’s a marvel to see how we as humans can adapt. God is pretty incredible in His design that way.
If you aren’t familiar with the book, love languages are how you primarily receive and express love. There are five categories that Dr. Chapman has outlined: Words of Affirmation, Gifts, Acts of Service, Quality Time and Physical Touch. A brief synopsis for them is given on the website. Of course, most everyone utilizes more than one of these languages to indicate and/or feel love at any time, but each person has a primary one to which they default. I’ve been racking my brain, trying to remember what my test showed the first time, but this go ’round, my results showed as Receiving Gifts, Words of Affirmation and Quality Time. Actually, each of those three was only one apart (10, 9, 8) which I thought was interesting. The other two were much lower. I remember Quality Time and Receiving Gifts as high before, but not sure I scored the same or not. Guess right now I’m just not one for Acts of Service or Physical Touch. Maybe it’s because I’m single. Dunno. No real answers there.
One of the most interesting facets of human beings is our limited perspective, despite our best efforts. I strive to be pretty aware in life but I find myself drifting back here, too. And I thought about this subject again as I read through the book. Despite deeply knowing those closest to us, unless we go to great lengths to remind ourselves, we will always tend to give love how we choose to receive it. We typically assume everyone likes getting gifts because we do. I don’t know why, but I think that’s kind of funny. We are most often self-centered, even with the best intentions. I have been trying to identify the primary love language of those closest to me in order to communicate better that I love them. I’ve got a long way to go, but hey, at least I’m thinking about it!
Maybe it’s something to work on more in 2012. Maybe it’s my latest fad. Maybe it’s just a really good book. Maybe it was a way to connect to my friend. Maybe I created this blog unknowingly as a gift to you. Ha–pretty self-centered, huh! 😉
Always questions and rarely answers. Ain’t life grand!
Regardless, enjoy and comment. Let me know your love language and help me remember it when I’m with you next. Don’t know yours? Take the quiz online and get back to me.
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March 31, 2012 at 11:06 pm
Words of affirmation and quality time. Good post! That was a fun quiz. 🙂